8-31 Normal

My normal seems to be in constant flux. What is normal shifts for me week by week. So, four months after Jason’s death, here is what normal is. I cry in the car. A lot, but not every day. I mostly don’t reach for my phone to message him during the day, but I talk…

8-30 Grief: A Metaphor

Our minds have a landscape.  Each person builds their own landscape over the course of their lifetime.  Over here is where the filing cabinet with phone numbers and your Social Security Number is.  And this is the path you take every morning when you get up and put clothes on.  And this is the cul…

8-7 Grief and Gratitude

One-hundred days ago, Jason died.  Even before the doctors came in to tell me he was dead, I knew.  I knew because they took my mother out of the room, I knew because of the whispering in the hall.  Honestly, I knew before any of that.  I knew in some flicker of consciousness between the…